Love letter to our little

Callen is 18 months! Man, I love this age!

This past Sunday, we formally dedicated Callen to the Lord. Of course, we'd done so many time in our personal thoughts and prayers as we sought guidance and asked for blessings for him. But Sunday our church community joined us in committing to do our best to show him Jesus, to give him unconditional love and to entrust him into God's hands day after day.

For a bit of background, in our church we treat dedication as more of a commitment on the part of the parents and church family to love and guide the child in the way of the Lord, rather than as a guarantee of the child's right-standing with God. We believe when the child is older, they still must choose for themselves whether to follow the Lord.

Our church invites parents to write a letter to their child expressing how the child is a gift and how they hope to guide the child. Our letter is as imperfect as we are parents, but also as full of love. Here is it (with some parenthetical notes).

Dear Callen,

You are our pumpkin bear, our chicken wiggle, our little man. (Josh asked that I read that first line. It might have, maybe, possibly had something to do with the fact that I critiqued his pronunciation of "pumpkin" during the letter composition: "Honey, it's more like punkin..." Knowing I would never make it through the whole thing without crying, I let him take it after that.) We are crazy about how God knit you together, though we know we will spend a lifetime getting to know all the wonders he has put inside you. We love your big hugs and little pats on the shoulder. You make us laugh with your silly ways, and we love watching you as you learn how to do it on purpose. You take joy in the small things and help us see light on dark days. And the way you and Gavin play is just awe-inspiring.

We are so, so grateful that God has chosen to make us your parents. Woohoo! (Somehow, the woohoo was not read aloud...hmmm...) We for sure hit the jackpot with you and Gavin. And we are so humbled. You and your brother make us want to be our best selves, and though we are frail, we know that the Lord is faithful to do more than we ask or seek as we continue to rely on Him.

Today we, with our family and our church community, pause in this sacred space and commit to do all we can to help you know and take stock in the love of a God who spared nothing, not even His own Son, to make a way for you to be His forever. How we hope that at each step, you say “yes” to what God has for you. Yes to grace, yes to joy, yes to love, yes to the adventure of faith. How we pray that the clumsy, imperfect way we walk this walk somehow still helps you see life with Jesus as the truest north, the greatest reality and worth anything you have to give up to pursue it whole-heartedly.

We pray that as you get to know your creator and as you live in community with your church family, you are inspired: (I added a few lines below after we read the letter in church because I kept struggling with how to say what I wanted to say until I was cutting up pineapple in a quiet house the next day. Doesn't that happen to everyone?)

To be kind – taking the time to make the world a better place in simple ways

To wonder – taking in the countless ways God weaves beauty into our lives

To be compassionate – seeing others as God does and acting out of a loving heart

To join God in his ongoing rescue of the oppressed – shining light in dark places

To keep your heart open – listening to others, giving help and being ready to receive help

Callen, you are already such a valued member of our community. We take joy in knowing that God will continue to use you to teach us. We look forward to learning from what we hope you are bold enough to share, and brave enough to ask. We pray that you and your brother love and lead, being always ready to humbly point people to Jesus.

As we share a few of the hopes and dreams we have for you today, we want you to know that we will love you no matter what you do. We hope you will always see our love as a safe place to come home to, and yet the love we have for you cannot compare to the love God has for you.

You are a treasure. We love you, son. 

Love,
Daddy and Mommy

What Callen is doing at 14.5 months

I wrote a handful of these "what he is doing" posts for my first son, and in typical second-child fashion, I've done none for my second. Nor are there any pictures of him hanging on the wall. No photo books. His baby book is empty. Sigh.

But, our lives are full of joy, full of all kinds of chores and tasks, full of adventure, full of giggles and snickers and belly laughs -- full. And that's good. And here are some of the things that are filling us up lately.

Just today:

• He was saying "du-du" for duck and making a Donald-Duck-type quacking sound (that he surely learned from daddy).
• He was making a kissing sound! He's already blown kisses and given kisses, but today he just made the sound when we were talking about kisses and then later when we were tucking Gavin in for his nap. (Awww.)
• He signed "milk!" (He's already doing "all done" and "more.")

Also recently, he's started saying his version of "blehck" when I say something is yucky (and just today, he did it when I said something was "not for babies" -- precious! And when he wants picked up, he holds his arms straight up and stiff now instead of relaxed like he used to and looks at us like, "I'm cute. I know this is cute!"

Last week, he started making the chomping sound when he eats something, or pretends to eat something, or when I find a scrap of paper on the floor and pick it up before he can grab it and put it in his mouth.

And when he finishes a sip of his drink, he sometimes says, "Ahh." Which he learned from his grandma. Ha ha!

Other sounds he makes: the vroom of a car or plane, the toot of a train and animal sounds for elephant, cat, dog, cow, horse.

His words are (in order of appearance):

da-da (just before 11 months)

ma-ma (used sparingly, usually when he's mad, just like Gavin did)

na-na: can mean any food, but usually banana, orange (because in Spanish it is naranja); he uses it more when he's eating something he loves

tap

ba (can conveniently mean button, berries, ball, box, or any number of things) 

He loves to dance, even to something as simple as his brother's beat boxing and guitar sounds. He loves to clap, and if he doesn't have two hands free when he wants to clap, he'll pat his chest. He claps after songs, when he hears others clapping or when I tell him "good job." Be still my heart.

He loves toys! For as long as I can remember, he has loved them. Such a change from Gavin, who only loved playing outside or playing with me until he was about 3. Callen especially loves nesting cups, stacking, putting lids on containers and stirring with a spoon and bowl, but he will imitate almost any action with a toy the first time he sees it (if developmentally able). This should come in "handy" when his brother employs him as an accomplice for all his impish ideas...which I'm sure will happen way sooner than I think. Like tomorrow.

And finally, Callen's love tags: those sweet names that don't always make sense but are inspired by pure baby cuteness and flow out of my mouth when I'm all caught up in it. As you'll see below, the love tags have tended to revolve around anything having to do with pumpkins and bears. (I don't know why.)

Pumpkin
Bear
Pumpkin Bear
Sweet Bear
Pumpkin Butter
Pumpkin Muffin
Wiggle Worm
Chicken Wiggle (because of the Slugs and Bugs songs that is just so perfect)
Cuddle Bear
Huggie Bear
Snuggle Bear
Snuggle Pop
Snuggle Pocket

And if you think some of those are weird, you should check out Gavin's baby/toddler love tag list. It was way weirder.

Baby Dedication Letter - A Guest Post of Sorts

A few weeks ago, our friends dedicated their adorable two-year-old son (name omitted for his privacy) to the Lord. They wrote him this letter, which they read to him in front of the church. It floored me. It was so sweet and personal and profound. They have graciously allowed me to share it with you. 

I love the way their letter highlights the goodness of God, their son's personality and the individualized instruction they desire to give him in the Lord. It is precious to me that they want to be careful not to fit him into a predetermined mold or even create a carbon copy of themselves, but rather grow someone who's faith is vibrant in the Lord in the context of the person God made him to be. I believe this captures much of what Proverbs 22:6 is talking about, and in a very beautiful way:

Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

I hope you enjoy the letter as I have. I know I will be praying many parts of it for Gavin...in the context of who God has created him to be.

(For a bit of background: in our church, we treat dedication as more of a commitment on the part of the parents and church family to love and guide the child in the way of the Lord, rather than as a guarantee of the child's right-standing with God. We believe when the child is older, they still must choose for themselves whether to follow the Lord.)

Oh, and notice the love tags in the first line. Love them!

Dear Son,

You are our silly goose, our cuddly bear, our wild monkey, our little rascal, and we love you more than we could have ever imagined. You are a perfect gift to us. You bring us happiness. We are blessed everyday by your enormous smiles and sweet giggles. Your joyful personality attracts everybody. We are encouraged and in awe of your carefree spirit. You make us laugh all the time! We love watching you enjoy life, from jumping at the playgrounds, splashing in the pool, kicking soccer balls, sharing a spoon at the yogurt shop, popping water balloons in your face, to letting the world know whenever you spot a bulldozer.  The list could go on, but life though your eyes is pure joy.

From the day you were born, we’ve felt enormous commitment and responsibility to make your world safe, beautiful, and happy.

Spending time with you clears our mind to see past the stress and worries in our life.

God knew just right person for us.

Now that you’re two, our focus as parents shifts from just meeting your basic needs to being intentional about how we raise you. We’re committed to creating an environment free of fear, where you can make mistakes and try new things and find out how to be fully you.

We want to teach you that everyone is valued and loved and we treat everyone with kindness and respect.  We’re committed to having fun together as a family.

We’re committed to giving you opportunities to find your passions and to teach you about the love of Jesus.  Every step of this life seems impossible without trusting that God is in control of your life. 

Your family and community of friends will have a lasting impact on your life. Our family will always love and support you (even though some live far away), and you are also blessed to have a strong family-like community nearby. We will continue to surround you with those who model Jesus’ love. Our hope is that our family and our community of friends will be a safe place for you. We will be your mentors. We will support and guide you, and live as examples for you.

And lastly, we dream that you will know joy and happiness. That you will want to help others and join in God’s work to make this world a better place. We dream that you will discover and say “yes” to the person that God has made you to be. We dream that our family will continue to grow together and that you will always feel the same closeness and tangible love that you experience now.

With love,

Daddy and Mommy

Every Age is the Best Age (?)

I've probably mentioned it in an earlier post, how some people told me every age is the best age (and how some other people laughed at them). At this point (26 months into my first child), I'm not sure who's right, and the optimist in me wants to believe the former. That said, it's actually hard for me to imagine it getting better than this!  ... Oh -- did I forget to tell you to get our your air-sickness bags for this post? Okay, well get them out, but even if you're a cynic, don't stop reading yet. Later, it will be so much more satisfying to point and laugh when you're armed with this ammo.

Things are far from perfect, but I am loving this age. Two. Yes, I said it. I'm actually starting to feel a little sick to my stomach right now because I know that 27 months, 30 months and so on are going to look very different than 26 months. My mom tells me "terrible threes" were much more a part of my toddler existence than "terrible twos," so, if he's like me, I may have a long time to wait for the other shoe to drop. No matter what may be ahead, I am enjoying these moments so much. It's hard for me to imagine more back-to-back cuteness and hilarity than we are having right now.

It's been a while (too long) since I wrote a what's-happening-now post, so summarizing is out of the question (too much). Instead, here are snippets. I hope they bring you some joy.

I love his inflections! They are sounding more and more like (exactly) the way we say things (scary) and less like baby robot talk (monotone phrases). The inflections, oh the inflections! And he sometimes helps us with our "lines" if we're not playing our part correctly (for those of you just tuning in, he's the first-born of two first-borns...) For example, if we help him when he wants to do it himself, he'll say, "Oh! I sorry!" which means, "Mom, Dad, I'm sure you're so sorry you just pulled my jacket off when you should have known I wanted to do it myself. Put it back on, and I'll struggle with it and eventually ask you for help but feel like I did it myself, and then everything will be okay!"

He is starting to comment on what he's doing. He'll be walking around, "Doo be doo be doo," and then say, "Singing a song." The other day, he was playing close by while I was getting ready, and I heard him say under his breath to himself, "This'll be funny," as he set one car on top of another.

He is making huge strides with both gross motor skills and singing. Since it's my blog (not my husband's), I'll start by describing...the singing! This is where I wish I had been blogging more often. The progress in his singing over the last few months has been so fun to watch. It's amazing to me how he's gone from singing most of the words to "Twinkle Twinkle" on the same monotone pitch to now singing all the words to several songs and sometimes even matching the up and down of the pitch. A few days ago, I was singing, "She'll be comin' 'round the mountain," and he started doing the echo he's heard on some recordings, just out of the blue. Love it! A week or so ago, he made up his own song:

Old MacDonald had some food.
E-i-e-i-o
With a yummy, yummy here and a yummy, yummy there...

So, on to gross motor skills. He is "all boy" in this department, (and I am beginning to visualize/dread the day where he scales his crib through sheer will power). In fact, after climbing a challenging structure at our playground, he said, "Gavin is a big kid now." Here are his latest physical toddler feats:

• He is consistently walking the wide beam at our toddler gym with no hands.
• With his feet on the low bar of the uneven bars and his hands on the high bar, he can swing down and hang on the low bar without going kersplat.
• He is starting to use his feet to do things: close the door, pick up a book, etc. He thinks he's pretty tough.
• He is climbing up ladders and other bar-type structures, mostly without giving me heart-failure.
• He just loves running, climbing, jumping, and he is always thinking of his next cool trick.

Gavin walking up the mat backwards

Recently during open gym at our little toddler gym, he got really into passing the ball back and forth with his friend's dad (with his dad standing right there...nope, the all-around athlete/soccer player didn't get his feelings hurt AT ALL). Even though, playing with his own daddy would have been ideal, we were both pretty excited that he was willing to go back and forth with anyone. Prior to that, most ball play was strictly solo despite our best efforts (as in, "Look, guys. I threw that ball, I watched where it landed, I analyzed its every move. Touch it and my day will pretty much be ruined...and so will yours"). Don't worry, Josh didn't stay emotionally injured too long. The next day they were playing ball together. All is right with the world.

Okay, so is anyone else's kid obsessed with fake crying? We just ended a pretty long phase where he did it a ton! And most of the time, he wasn't necessarily trying to manipulate us; it was like he role-playing or something. Sometimes he would just start fake crying for no apparent reason. Then he would look at me and say in a pathetic tone, "What's the matter?" meaning, "Ask me what's the matter." I would oblige and he'd say, "Gavin crying," in that same tone, complete with cracks in his voice and everything. Whether real or fake crying, he would love to watch himself do it in a mirror. Just our family? Anyone else? 

He is just starting to get into make-believe. A blessing because it is a milestone. A challenge because doing puzzles is so much easier than following a toddler storyline! With make-believe, and with everyday encounters, I hear him using our conversational styles and phrases. At dinner, he asks Josh, "So, how was your day?" or "Have a good work?" Sometimes, he'll ask Millie (our dog) if she had a good breakfast (whether she's moved from her bed yet or not). He tells one of his little bears, "C'mon, let's go over here." Absolutely needless to say, I'm loving it!

I leave you with this. He's discovered the magic of the phrases "Mommy lets me" and "Daddy lets me" if he's been told "no" by the other parent. (He doesn't have the pronoun thing down yet, so it's actually "Mommy lets you" and "Daddy lets you.") The funny things is, usually, he's telling the absolute truth. (Sometimes daddy is surprised by what daring tricks mommy lets him do. So then we pow-wow and decide on the best [united] course.)

The dead give-away that Gavin is probably NOT being truthful? He puts on his most earnest, desperate face and uses his favorite catch-all: "Grandpa lets you."

Of course he does(n't), Sweetie. Of course he does(n't).

Default to Joy

As some of you know, our sweet son has a helmet to fix his little flat head (and it has started working after just a few weeks!).  When I posted a picture on Facebook of him wearing the helmet, my sister-in-law commented, "I love how he is so happy, just takes everything in stride! Doesn't seem to phase him one bit!" And it's true. 


We've been blessed with such a happy baby! I have to give credit to the Lord for reaching outside mine and Josh's genes to accomplish that! Not that we are unhappy people -- we are very happy and have so much to be thankful for, but come on now -- two firstborns who have structured, Type A tendencies and whose desire for excellence and order can sometimes leave them, shall I say, cranky in the midst of otherwise sunny circumstances?! It truly has caught me off guard that Gavin seems to default to joy! When he was a tiny baby, it even seemed that he would try to keep himself from crying and calm himself at certain times in the face of discomfort. As he continued to grow, he would smile at us for no apparent reason and laugh at the simplest things. Don't get me wrong, it's not a 24-hour party, especially since he recently turned 9 months and (as the books said would happen) his opinions are sounding more like protests. But even still, he likes being happy -- for lots of reasons, and for no reason at all.


And it's this "no reason at all" that has me reflecting the most. It reminds me that when I was pregnant and reading lots of books about having babies, raising babies, and especially how not to mess them up, I would think about the kind of home that I wanted Gavin to grow up in. I know that I tend to get anxious about small things and obsess over details. I know that when my mind is not occupied with a pressing matter at hand, it tends to gravitate to "how can I do more, get more, squeeze more into this minute" rather than "how can I give thanks, give back, and find joy in the moment". It is with this in mind, that I started praying that ours would be a home that defaults to joy. In the absence of a reason or activity, I prayed that it would be joy that our minds settle on and that our hearts move toward. 


I see the Lord answering my prayer in an unexpected way (which I guess should be expected). I know our home will have a profound impact on how Gavin grows up. But when I look at this happy baby, I realize the way that he defaults to joy is having a profound impact on us -- inspiring us to continue seeking joy as a theme in our home. And so, Gavin is shaping the home that will continue to shape him. 

Amazing God. Humbled, thankful mom.